Nothing says Christmas joy quite like vaginas.Just like Christmas, they bring delight, festive feelings, and the scent of roasted chestnuts.* We can’t think of anything more fittingly Christmas-y to deck your halls with than vagina and vulva themed decorations. Because Christmas is all about happiness, the spirit of giving, and togetherness. Same goes for your downstairs area. So we were delighted when we discovered that one wonderful crafter is finally giving the world what it’s so desperately been waiting for: handmade vulva baubles, crafted out of felt. Feltmelons makes glorious vulva baubles in a wide range of jazzy colours (pink is fitting, but green feels more festive), all hand-crafted with wool-blend felt and lovingly embroidered. The clitoris is a jingling Christmas bell, that you can happily tap and stroke for festive fun. And there are different sizes available, so you can choose a more subtle bauble or a statement vulva for the top of your tree.

Each one is stuffed and embroidered, and while the labia are smoother and more uniform than the real thing, they are folded to give a multi-dimensional effect. Feltmelons also recommends holding up the ornaments to your ear to ‘hear waves crashing on distant, rocky shores’, but we aren’t entirely convinced that’s a thing.christmas decorations ideas with ribbon Regardless, these baubles are an absolute delight and we fully intend on covering our tree with a rainbow array of happily jingling vulva.party store christmas decorations We do know it’s early to be mentioning Christmas stuff, by the way, but sometimes Christmas spirit is a lot like the vagina, surprising you by delivering (whether in terms of orgasms, periods, or children) earlier than expected.best place to buy christmas decorations canada

Plus Feltmelons is Canada-based and the vulva baubles may take a little while to be shipped. So if you’re hoping to deck the halls with boughs of vulva, it’s worth putting orders in now. MORE: People are decorating Christmas trees for Halloween to get into the spooky spiritnatural christmas decorations ideas MORE: We need to stop letting companies profit from our fear and confusion around vaginasbedroom decorating ideas colours MORE: Finally, someone’s made a silicone mask that turns your face into a vaginababy room ideas for day nurseries The White House Christmas Tree in the Blue Room of the White House in Washington, DC, November 29, 2016.

A decorated Christmas tree almost reaches the ceiling of the Blue Room of the White House, a preview of holiday decorations being assembled for the season, in Washington, December 2, 2015. The official White House Christmas tree in the Blue Room at the White House. The 18 foot tree has over 2000 ornaments. A total of 26 Christmas trees are part of the decorations. About 65,000 people visited the White House during the holidays. (Photo by Brooks Kraft LLC/Corbis via Getty Images) The White House Christmas Tree is pictured in the Blue Room of the White House in Washington, December 4, 2013. The 18.5-foot Douglas Fir was grown by Chris Botek, a second generation Christmas Tree Farmer from Crystal Spring Tree Farm in Lehighton, Pennsylvania. The official White House Christmas tree, an 18-foot-6-inch Fraser Fir from Jefferson, North Carolina, stands in the Blue Room during a preview of the 2012 White House holiday decorations November 28, 2012 at the White House in Washington, DC.

The first lady welcomed military families, including Gold Star and Blue Star parents, spouses and children, to the White House for the first viewing of the 2012 holiday decorations. The theme for the White House Christmas 2012 is 'Joy to All.' (Photo by Alex Wong/Getty Images) A view of the official White House Christmas tree in the Blue Room during a media tour of the holiday decorations at the White House in Washington, November 30, 2011. The tree features cards written by children of U.S. military members and medals, badges and patches from all branches of the U.S. military. The official White House Christmas tree is displayed in the Blue Room during a media tour of the holiday decorations on December 1, 2010 in Washington, DC. This year's decoration theme is titled 'Simple Gifts,' which was inspired by our nation's state and county fairs. (Photo by Mark Wilson/Getty Images) The official White House Christmas tree is displayed in the Blue Room of the White House during a press tour of the holiday decorations in Washington, DC, on December 2, 2009.

The Douglas Fir, lit with environmentally friendly LED lights and decorated with more than 800 ornaments from previous White House administrations stands 18.5 feet high and nearly 13 feet wide. The official White House Christmas Tree, a Fraser Fir, is seen on display in the Blue Room during the White House Holiday media preview at the White House in Washington, DC on December 3, 2008. The tree is decorated with 369 hand decorated ornaments from all over the US. This years theme is 'A Red, White and Blue Christmas.' The official White House Christmas tree stands in the Blue Room during a press preview of the White House holiday decorations November 29, 2007 in Washington, DC. 'Holiday in the National Parks' was the theme of the White House 2007 holiday decorations. The official White House Christmas tree stands in the Blue Room of the White House as seen from the Cross Hall of the White House in Washington, November 30, 2006. White lilies and crystal spheres cover the White House Christmas Tree during the media preview of the 2005 holiday decorations and tasting event in the Blue Room of the White House November 30, 2005 in Washington, DC.

The White House's holiday theme for 2005 is 'All Things Bright and Beautiful.' (Photo by Chip Somodevilla/Getty Images) One of the 41 Christmas trees displayed at the White House in Washington, D.C.. The entire White House was decorated by 51 volunteers assembling 660 feet of garland, 41 trees, 245 wreaths, 221 bows, and 155,500 lights to celebrate the Christmas Holiday season. A Frazer Fir Christmas tree is apart of White House Christmas decorations, December 4, 2003, in Washington, DC. The First Lady Laura Bush hosted a media preview of the decorations that focused on 'A Season Of Stories'. A decorated 18-foot tall fir tree stands in the Blue Room at the White House December 5, 2002 in Washington, D.C. First lady Laura Bush hosted a media preview of the decorations that focused on presidential pets. A Christmas tree stands in the middle of the Blue Room in the White House December 3, 2001 in Washington DC. The First lady Laura Bush hosted a media preview of the decorations today to officially kick off the White House Christmas season.

The official White House Christmas tree stands in the Blue Room of the White House December 4, 2000 in Washington DC. First Lady Hillary Rodham Clinton announced that ''Holiday Reflections'' will be the White House holiday theme. (Photo by Michael Smith/Newsmakers) Hillary Clinton shows off the Christmas tree in the Blue Room during a tour of the White House in December 1997. The first lady collaborated with the National Needlework Association, the Council of Fashion Designers of America and glass artisans to create a 'Santa's Workshop' theme, the White House Historical Association reported. (The Washington Post via Getty Images) In this handout provided by the White House, President Barack Obama and First Lady Michelle Obama pose for a formal portrait in front of the official White House Christmas Tree in the Blue Room of the White House, December 6, 2009 in Washington, DC. (Photo by Lawrence Jackson/White House via Getty Images) President George W. Bush and first lady Laura Bush stand in front of the Blue Room Christmas tree prior to hosting a reception for Kennedy Center honorees December 8, 2002 in Washington, D.C.

The first lady is wearing a full-length gown designed by Arnold Scaasi. (Photo by Eric Draper/White House/Getty Images) First Lady Barbara Pierce Bush, wife of President George Bush, 41st President of the United States, poses in front of one of the White House Christmas trees in the Blue Room, Washington, D.C. (Photo by Consolidated News Pictures/Getty Images) President Ronald Reagan and Nancy Reagan hang ornaments, made for them by the two Korean children that they brought back from Korea on Air Force One for heart surgery, in their residence on December 24th. The Reagans will spent Christmas in the White House before flying to California for the New Year. (Bettmann via Getty Images) First Lady Rosalynn Carter poses near Christmas Tree in the Blue Room of the White House. First Lady Betty Ford stands near a Christmas tree December, 1975 at the White House, Washington, DC. (Photo by Dirck Halstead/Liaison) President Nixon and his family pose in front of the Christmas Tree in the Blue Room of the White House on Christmas Eve.

They celebrated the holiday in the Executive Mansion and were joined later in the day by Mamie Eisenhower and her son and daughter-in-law, former Amb. and Mrs. John Eisenhower. Left to right: Tricia and her husband, Edward Cox; Pres. and Mrs. Nixon; and Julie, and her husband , Ens. David Eisenhower. Mrs. Lyndon Johnson, on the eve of her 55th birthday, standing in front of the White House Christmas tree in the Blue Room, December 20th. President and Mrs. Kennedy admire the White House Christmas tree in the Main Lobby during a picture taking session. Later, approximately 1,200 men and women employed in the Executive offices joined the first Couple to receive their annual gift and enjoy some Christmas refreshments. President Truman made a plea for peace at ceremonies during the lighting of the Christmas tree on the south grounds of the White House. Photo shows the White House in the background as the President speaks from the center platform. In 1934, White House visitors stop to watch the final decorations go on the White House Christmas tree in the executive mansion's East Room.